Confessions of a Model

 

I need bigger breasts!
I need to lose weight!
I need to fix my face!
What's wrong with me?!

I play into this chauvinistic world,
I perpetuate the stereotypes!
I'm just an insecure woman,
Like everyone else who was deemed unfit.

What happened to heart?
Personality?
Love?
Does anything matter but looks?

Now we have plastic surgery,
I can fix myself!
Surgeons feeding off of insecurities.
I need more to be beautiful!

I'm a size 4,
But I'm a plus sized model?
I know I'm not fat,
But I need to lose weight!

When did throwing up start to look glamerous?
When did carrot sticks start tasting delicious?
When did not eating make me feel pretty?
And why does cake look like poison?

Enjoying my life?
What a laugh!
I pretend to be happy for the camera,
But I'm a glutton inside!

Last week I craved ice cream!
(So shameful.)
I dared to eat chocolate!
(So sinful.)

They fired me!
I'm too fat again!
Maybe dieting just isn't enough,
I have to be skinny at all costs.

Return to the surgeon is met with glee,
He can't get enough of how bad I feel.
"I'm still not pretty," I tell him,
And he promises to fix me.

What have you done to me!
What ever happened to average beauty?
Why is everyone ugly to me?

If I could take it all back, I would.
I'm too old for this game now.

My fake breasts sag,
I'm riddled with scars.
I don't look natural
Because my face is twenty years younger than my body.

People think they'll look young,
Completely,
Forever.

Why can't people just be happy with how they look?
Why do they follow the same pattern I did?
It's not a good way to go.

I tell every woman out there reading,
You're beautiful just the way you are.
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